It’s Time to Realize How Really Handsome You Are!



“It’s not your hair that makes you handsome; it’s your personality.”
Charlie Wehrley

I have a good friend who’s gradually losing his hair. He likes to claim that it doesn’t really bother him, but he keeps a comb in his car (as vain as I am, I don’t even do that) and he’s always combing his hair forward to cover balding areas. He’s also constantly forcing it forward with his hand if the wind blows up.

So I suspect that his hair loss bothers him more than he likes to let on. He’s the type of person who likes to laugh everything off, and that makes it hard to know just how much something painful really eats at his heart. But when hair loss came up again while we were talking recently I told him “It’s not your hair that makes you handsome; it’s your personality—and you’ll never lose that.” And it's really true. He has the type of personality that makes him loveable in every respect because it's who he REALLY is.

Unfortunately in our society people often don’t get to know others well enough to realize just how handsome they are— personality-wise, that is. I know as a codependent, I never wanted to get to know the real me. I was afraid I’d dislike myself even more than I already did, so I was always running from myself. As a result of never getting to know myself well, I never allowed myself to get to know others well either.

Instead of getting to know how “handsome” people were by getting to know their personalities, I simply judged people on their looks. If someone was outwardly handsome to me then I wanted to know them, but if they weren’t outwardly handsome, I passed on them. I would have passed on this current friend of mine too if it weren’t for recovery.

Recovery has helped me face and get to know myself better. It’s helped me to love my personality and thus to look below the surface with everyone. It’s taught me that some of the most “handsome” people aren’t always pretty on the outside. And even if they are, that form of “handsome” gradually fails, but a “handsome” personality never fails.

If we are looking in the mirror and thinking that our value is only in our outer appearance, we need to stop being so mean to ourselves. It isn’t hair, or a button nose, or big eyes or small ears that make a person truly handsome. Personality makes each of us truly handsome. So get to know the real YOU better. The more you open up to the real you, the more you will see that you are indeed uniquely handsome—that you always have been and always will be.

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