Against Our Vices We See Our Virtues
“Folks who have no vices have few
virtues.”
Abraham Lincoln
It’s
important to own our vices. In recovery, we refer to them as “character
defects,” which seems a bit harsh to me. I’m not sure that there’s a nicer word
for them. We could refer to them as “vices” or “flaws,” I suppose. But the
truth is that they are the imperfections that emerge from our dark side.
Every
human being has a “light” side and a “dark” side. We are all part Dr. Jekyll
and part Mr./Ms. Hyde. And we need to accept this fact. There is no such thing
as a perfect person. No one is all light-- and no one is all darkness.
What
we often don’t understand is that light and darkness need each other. Think
about a flashlight. Flashlights are worthless on a bright sunny day. It’s
impossible to tell if the flashlight is on or off in the midst of sunlight. A
flashlight is dependent upon darkness to make its light seen—and so are we.
When
we work Step 4 of the 12 Steps, it gives us the opportunity to recognize the
darkness that is within us. It also gives us the chance to embrace that
darkness. By embracing the darkness, by owning it, we are one step closer to
learning from it. In the midst of our personal darkness we begin to better
understand how we work as humans. We gain knowledge and wisdom about ourselves.
By
embracing our darkness, we better understand ourselves and we are now better
able to change ourselves in positive ways. We find light in the darkness.
Against our vices we see our virtues.
This
is why it’s so important for us to own our vices or character defects. They
help us to grow into being better humans and more virtuous people.
So
working Steps 4 and 5 are not about beating ourselves up. They are not about
having to admit they we are worthless because we can’t be perfect. These Steps
are about being real.
Acknowledging
that we are imperfect, that we do have faults and failings, is essential. Steps
4 and 5 are a positive reality check. They are about finding our light and our
virtues within our faults and failings. These Steps place us closer toward
honestly becoming exactly who we are: imperfect reflections of the image and
likeness of God.
Step 4: Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
Step 5: We admitted to God, to ourselves and to another person the exact nature of our wrongs.
Step 4: Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
Step 5: We admitted to God, to ourselves and to another person the exact nature of our wrongs.
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