Sadness Is the Healing Feeling

I often wonder why sadness has become taboo in our country. It didn’t use to be that way. The ancient native Americans had a wonderful proverb: “If the eyes had no tears, the soul would have no rainbow.” They understood the healing power of sadness and the need the human soul has to express and then release it’s sorrow. They knew it cleansed the soul and returned a rainbow of happiness to anyone who was willing to grieve their losses.

Today, however, we are taught to almost be ashamed of feeling sad. As small children we are discouraged from crying. If we fall off our bike, adults hand us cookies and forcibly tell us  “DON’T CRY! You’re OK. STOP crying!”

Why can’t we adults simply allow a child who, has fallen and scraped his/her knee, to cry until they feel better? Why is it that we can’t bear the idea of anyone being sad? The feeling of sadness is as necessary to the healing of the soul as the element of rain is to the healing of parched earth. Yet we rarely want to face a day of sadness or rain. This puts us at odds with nature and the flow of God’s plan for the betterment of our lives.

After we have faced the feelings of betrayal, shock, loss, disappointment, anger and hurt, we must face the final grieving feeling; the one that truly brings us back to emotional balance-- sadness. It’s important for us to blanket our souls in sadness the same way we would blanket our bodies with woolen cloth when we are sick with a cold or the flu. Like our bodies, our wounded emotions need time and comfort to heal.

If you haven’t allowed yourself to feel the fullness of each and every emotion after something bad has happened to you, you are in emotional limbo and you will stay there until you revisit those stymied feelings. You must fully and completely feel the betrayal till it transforms into shock or a sense of loss. Likewise, you must fully feel the heaviness of your loss until it transforms into disappointment, anger and hurt. Once you have fully felt the sting of your inner-hurt, it will melt into a deepening sadness. Stay with the sadness until the inner-clouds begin to clear.

Once the clouds begin to clear, stand up and go about your day. Things will begin to return to normal inside you and outside. You will feel noticeably lighter. And although the situation may be the same-- all of the sadness in the world won’t bring back a loved one, for example-- you will be ready for the next big step: Acceptance of what has happened. And acceptance is the key to regaining your balance, serenity and having the ability to move forward in life once again.