Be as Grateful as You Can Be

There’s much emphasis on gratitude in recovery circles, but I don’t think it’s as simple as it sounds. We hear a lot about “act as if” you are grateful or “fake it till you make it.” This can work to a degree in helping us to develop a more positive vision. But it doesn’t work all that well when something that’s truly key to our lives is missing.

“Acting as if” becomes pretty hollow after you discover that you yourself are missing from your life. “Fake it till you make it” only goes so far when the great love you’ve always longed for never materializes. And no amount of gratitude for wealth, good health or anything else can balance the desperation that comes with never having lived the life that deep-down you really wanted.

So on this Thanksgiving Day, be as grateful as you can be. No one is required to be 100 percent grateful when they have a hole in their heart, and that’s OK. We all do the best that we can in any given moment. If we aren’t feeling as grateful as we think we “should” be feeling, we don’t have to guilt or shame ourselves.

Instead we can practice being patient and kind to ourselves today. We can have some compassion and empathy for ourselves today. And we can be just as grateful as we are capable of being, knowing that our Higher Power understands.

Then we can begin the journey of finding what’s missing from our lives, whether it be ourselves, that great soulmate or lover we always wanted, or the life that we have never allowed ourselves to hope for and live.

Let’s be thankful that we now know that nothing is stopping us but us from having all we’ve longed for; and let’s pray for the ability to build that life we’ve always wanted by caring for ourselves.