Supreme Self-Love Is the Only Satisfying Fuel for Empty Souls

“I look at you and I fantasize, you're mine tonight,

now I've got you in my sights… With these hungry eyes,

One look at you and I can't disguise,

I've got hungry eyes.”
Eric Carmen, Hungry Eyes

 

Hungry Eyes was a very popular song (peaking at #4 on the Billboard Hot 100) from a very popular movie (Dirty Dancing) back in 1988. At the time it made me, and apparently a lot of Americans, think about just how hungry the eyes often are. Seems my eyes were always hungry for some eye-candy back then. And, yes, there was a lot of fantasizing—and a lot of emptiness.

If the eyes are truly windows unto the soul, then hungry eyes are the symptom of a hungry, empty soul. I think I probably knew this subconsciously back in 1988, but I didn’t know what to do about it. All I knew was that I couldn’t possibly love me, and so I’d have to search elsewhere for soul-sustenance. How can we feed an empty soul when we refuse to give it love—the only food that can sustain it? Well, the only way is through hungry eyes. Hungry eyes are looking to feed the soul from outside. They are constantly searching for someone else to give the soul the inner-sustenance it’s starving to receive.

Problem is that feeding the soul from outside ourselves is like filling the gas tank on our car. You have to find a filling-station every few days to replenish the tank. A soul void of self-love is forever on empty. Love (and I’m using that word loosely here) from outside is never enough. It burns-up quickly, and it’s expensive—mentally, emotionally and sometimes monetarily. It’s also exhausting to be constantly trying to squeeze love and approval out of other people.

To make matters worse, those who have starved their souls of self-love have also intensified their need for intimacy to the point of often feeling desperate for attention and affection at any cost. Hungry eyes are an inner cry for the real intimacy that the soul and body need. But how can we be intimate with someone else, if we won’t allow ourselves to be intimate with us—first? If we refuse to open up to ourselves—and accept ourselves just as we are—how can we open up to someone else? We can’t. Fear that the other person will reject us in the same way that we have rejected ourselves will keep us from opening up to genuine intimacy with another. This is why all of our attempts for true intimacy with someone outside ourselves always come up spiritually empty.

True intimacy has to begin inside each of us. We first have to open-up to ourselves, know ourselves and love what we have come to know about ourselves. Self-love is the only fuel that can permanently fill our empty souls to satisfaction. Mix it with the love of God and you have a winning formula for Supreme self-love. Once we are up and running on this authentic blend of soul-fuel, we will no longer experience empty souls or hungry eyes. And when other people look at our faces, they will see bright eyes that shine with the glow of self-understanding and self-worth. They will see into the windows of our souls: Windows that reveal souls that authentically shine!