Take Charge of Your Life!



“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud
was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”
Anaïs Nin

Your life is what you make it. No one has to be a victim who holds everything in tight like a flower trapped in the perpetual darkness of fear. Being a victim, being shut-up tight inside, is a choice. And it’s a bad choice.

In recent years, through recovery, I’ve chosen to give up my victim mentality. I have learned that it is far less painful to take risks, even if I fail at times; and that it’s much more rewarding and life-affirming to blossom into the light of the real world where I gain wisdom through failure—and I grow into fully being me.

Life provides many doors for us to walk through and all we have to do is make the choice to walk through those doors. We can all walk through the doors to an Alano Club and into any 12 Step meeting that fits our particular recovery needs.

We can also choose to walk through any educational or career doors we wish. Recovery helps to get us back into touch with our deepest desires, our most natural talents and our individual skills. Once we reclaim these from our old addictive-victim patterns of behavior, no one can stop us from sharing ourselves with the real world and living our dreams. It’s our choice to make every day and we are the only persons on earth who can keep us from living our dreams.

So why would we want to do that? I used to think there was great pay-off to being a victim. Everyone felt sorry for me and I didn’t have to do anything but whine. But I also had no life. Eventually the pity parties end and everyone walks away. I mean, who wants to befriend a perpetual victim. Today I have to say “Not me!”

I know longer have much sympathy for people who constantly give their lives away—unlived—because they are too afraid to open up and say “Life’s a fact. People do get hurt; people do make mistakes, but that’s OK. I’m going to live my life to the fullest by taking those mistakes and making them into victories.”

Life doesn’t just happen. We have to take responsibility and be active co-creators of our lives. When one door closes, we need to look for the one that’s just opened. We need to decide what we want in life and then we need to go for it. This doesn’t even require courage. What it requires is determination. We have to be determined that life is worth living and that we are worthy of living life to the fullest. And then we need to start doing it—and never stop.

Walk through the doors that are calling your name and take charge of your life. Everyone can do it—no exceptions. If you’re scared, fine. Ask your Higher Power to help you. Reach out to friends. Then make your life what you really want it to be. Go for it! It’s time to blossom endlessly.

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