Soulshine

Most addictive personalities have difficulty with trust. We grew-up in families where trust was discouraged, or simply not possible to maintain. As a result we now struggle with the very concept of being able to trust anyone or anything. In recovery the first person we need to learn to trust is ourselves. That’s a hefty assignment for most of us, but an extremely necessary one. We can start by beginning to believe in our own personal value. Everyone has value in this world. There are no exceptions to that one fact. Once we start seeing ourselves as lovable, valuable and unique individuals, we can choose to move forward by trusting ourselves to make life-giving decisions. We will see that we are equal with everyone in this world in that we all have a purpose for being here. We will see that we all share the same purpose of fully growing into being the persons we were created to be. And, as we begin to grow mentally, emotionally and spiritually through our recovery programs...

“In the end what matters most is how well did you love, how well did you live, how well did you learn to let go.” Anonymous I found the statement above on a wall-banner in a small shop in Flagstaff , Arizona , earlier in the year. And I love its simple wisdom. Codependents, and all addictive personalities, spend most of their lives trying to control every aspect of every moment of every day—from whether or not the sun shines and just how much it shines, to what others choose to wear and how they choose to wear it, to what the checker at the grocery thinks about them and they’re eating habits. The problem with trying to control life is that it’s impossible to control life and live life at the same time. When we are always busy about controlling every moment of our day, we are in a defensive mode, a survival mode. No one enjoys being on the defensive. People enjoy life when they actually allow their day to unfold before them and they choose to walk through their day...