Soulshine

“I want a Higher Love that makes me feel unconditionally loved, heard, validated, and cared about at all times. I want a Higher Love that comforts me and makes me feel valuable. I want a Love so great that I feel safe, warm and cared about always.” I originally prayed these words last Friday. As the day progressed, I felt myself changing gently inside. Traffic in Los Angeles was horrific on Friday, so I decided against going back to Hollywood. Instead I went back to Knott’s Berry Farm to walk through the shops. I wanted to get something for the friends who have hosted me here, allowing me to stay with them. I found some nice things in one of the shops. The clerk who waited on me sent someone to get a gift box and it took considerable time for the person to return with the box. She (the clerk) was feeling the pressure, since we Americans are so impatient. But I wasn’t. In the past I would have felt impatient and anxious. I would have been agitated and mad. Friday I was at pea...

“I am the greatest!” Muhammad Ali In his book I AM , Howard Falco points out that Muhammad Ali declared himself the greatest boxer before he ever established that fact in the boxing ring. It’s Falco’s theory that Ali became the world’s greatest boxer because he believed himself to be the greatest. And Falco bases this theory in his personal belief that the purpose of the ego is to reinforce- and ultimately make real—whatever we believe about ourselves. I agree with Falco’s theory. Certainly in my own life, I have become the sum of my thoughts—of my I Am statements—which were too often self-negating. Throughout my life, my brain has been a vast sewer of negative I Am thoughts: I am not good enough, I am ugly, I am boring, I am stupid, I am bad, I am a disgrace, I am unworthy, I am unlovable… The list could go on and on. By the time I entered grade school I was already paralyzed by these thoughts. All of the wonderment, excitement and breath of life had been knocked out of me by what ...