Soulshine

Harriet Craig : “Please understand, Mr. Fenwick, Walter’s a fine man… but sometimes he just seems to lose all sense of responsibility.” Mr. Fenwick : “But I’ve always thought of him as being most reliable.” Harriet Craig : “So long as he’s in his present job, yes. And so long as I’m nearby to look after him.” Joan Crawford and Raymond Greenleaf , Harriet Craig (1950) Poor Harriet Craig! Her husband, Walter, has been offered a promotion. Normally that would be good news, but there’s a catch: The promotion will require Walter to work in Japan for three months—without Harriet. She’ll have to stay home and she will be unable to be the center of Walter’s universe. On hearing the “good” news, Harriet immediately feels threatened and her codependent thinking kicks into high gear. Just looking at her face, you can see every manipulative wheel within her brain spinning. She quickly hits panic mode: How will she be able to keep an eye on Walter 24/7 when he’s thousands of miles...

A major character defect shared by most all codependents is manipulation. Engaging in manipulation is fueled by the need to control. A codependent person cannot trust life or others. Of course, life is a fact that we have limited control over. And, unfortunately for the fear-filled codependent, we all need others no matter how independent we pretend to be. This fact provides a serious dilemma for the codependent person. The all-too codependent need to manipulate others plays out magnificently in the 1950 film Harriet Craig . Harriet needs her husband Walter and her cousin Claire, and yet she mistakenly believes she can’t trust either of them. Harriet’s never sure if Walter might betray her at any moment and so she keeps a tight grip on him. She almost never lets him out of her sight, and she’s learned that she needs to keep his leash short. You see, Walter has friends—both men and women—that he ran around with before he met and married Harriet. Those friends are now a thr...