Soulshine

   On this Valentine's Day, I offer you a prayer for self-love and self-nurturing:     Love is God’s gift to me. It is a gift I choose to accept today. I will walk into the sunshine of God’s love and allow each love-ray to enliven my soul. As I bask in this great warmth, I will share it with myself— allowing myself to feel my own inner-love for simply being me.    I will nurture that love by kissing my shoulders, by wrapping my arms around myself and giving myself a heart-warming hug. Then I will take time to do something else nurturing for me, like taking a long, gentle walk. It will give me time to talk to my Higher Power and to strengthen my body. Next, I will eat a meal filled with fruits and vegetables. And finally, I will do something I love: Read a book, take a nap, or watch a movie.    Later I will make time for friends. I will call a friend or family member and connect on an emotional and spiritual level. In these and...

Most everyone wants approval from others. And it can be very emotionally painful for some of us if approval is withheld. I didn’t realize how a devastating feeling from the past can arise from needing approval in the present moment until just last week. I was helping-out with a week-long retreat for Catholic nuns. The first of my two talks was one I call “Have I Loved Well.” In that talk I speak of the fact that when our day comes and we stand before God, He isn’t going to ask us how much money we made, or if we were good at bridge, or how well we ate. He’s only going to ask us one question “Did you love well?” As soon as I made that statement, one of the nun’s raised her hand and said “Oh, I don’t think you understand nuns. We don’t have bank accounts, and we don’t play bridge.” It threw me initially because 1) I made no mention of bank accounts. Sure, nuns may not have individual bank accounts, but they still have to “make money” to support their communities;   and ...

Betrayal is the feeling of being duped. It is the gut-wrenching emotion that leads us to feel abandoned and to experience a sense of loss. The world as we have known it has suddenly changed in a way that makes us feel unsafe. Our well-being is disturbed. And our trust is shaken. Betrayal happens in many different ways. Sometimes we betray ourselves, or we may feel that our bodies have betrayed us. This happens when we develop a serious illness. The immediate feeling we have is that our body has in some way turned against us. It’s been unfaithful. It’s let us down. This sense of betrayal can often lead to a second sense, once we get past the initial shock of our illness: That we are the ones who actually betrayed our own bodies. We refused to eat well, or to exercise or to treat our bodies with proper respect by avoiding cigarettes or avoiding excessive alcohol or drug consumption. New feelings then arise: primarily guilt, shame and remorse. In a flash, we can be filled wit...