Freedom from Shame Leads to Joy in Life

Freedom from shame means being “on our guard” or aware of our feelings at all times. It means being able to catch ourselves when we are being swept down a dark alley of emotional pain fueled by shame. When we are aware of our shameful feelings, we are able to make a powerful choice between addictive acting out, or facing the feelings. When we choose to face the feelings, we can challenge the ugly thoughts that fuel them, and we can take our personal power back from shame.

Facing our feelings requires that we be “courageous” enough to embrace them. It also requires that we be “strong” enough to ask for the help we may need to feel safe enough to fully recover our personal power.

We know that help is available to us. We can seek help through our Higher Power and we can seek help from family and friends that we are able to trust. We can also seek help through professionals, like therapist, spiritual directors or clergy, and we can seek help through support groups.

If we are uncomfortable with reaching out and asking for help, we must face this discomfort and the negative thoughts that fuel it. Fear and shame are most likely the culprits behind our uncomfortable feelings when we know we need to ask for help. Fear and shame cause us to feel unworthy to ask for help, or to “bother” others with our problems. If we face these feelings, we will realize that everyone feels some trepidation about asking for help. And that’s OK. It’s normal. So we can allow the feelings of discomfort to be there while we challenge the old beliefs we have about our being unworthy of help. These beliefs are bogus. Everyone, including us, is worthy of help and love.

As we embrace our feelings and challenge our stinking thinking, we need to do so with kindness, compassion and great love. As St. Paul says in 1 Corinthians “every act should be done with love.”

Self-love is the first step in the process of learning to love God and others. We must first love ourselves well if we are ever to love our Higher Power and others well.

Loving ourselves well starts with being kind to ourselves. It is enhanced by being gentle with ourselves, compassionate and understanding with ourselves. Self-acceptance is the key. We need to be willing to accept all of the things about ourselves that we have spent years being ashamed of.

Acceptance sets us free from our shame and helps us to love everything there is that makes us uniquely who we are. Acceptance gives us our freedom to be ourselves with great love.

PRAYER: God grant me the awareness to understand all of my emotions. Help me to be strong enough to embrace all of my feelings with love and kindness. And help me to have the courage to reach out to others for help as I need it. Most importantly, help me to do everything with great love: love for myself, love for You and love for everyone who enters onto my path as I journey toward emotional freedom! Amen.

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