Physical Beauty is About Falling in Lust, Inner-Beauty is About Falling in Love
Kahil Gibran
Frog Wisdom, Part Two: The collective conscious of the world has defined physical beauty: Height, flowing hair, slenderness, high cheek bones, large expressive eyes, and small lips are part of a winning beauty formula for women. Beauty in a man follows a similar formula: Height, thick hair, V-shaped from shoulders to waist, high cheek bones, brooding eyes and tight abs paint a portrait of the ideal man. Yet these portrayals of ideal men and women rarely fit the average person. Most everyone comes up short, especially when other false beauty or desirability factors are woven into the formula, such as name, title, money, overall social standing, et al.
The over-emphasis on physical beauty in this world reveals the fact that so many of us are spiritually depraved, because it eclipses the essential importance of inner-beauty. Ever wonder why so many “beautiful people” end up married to each other? Probably not. It seems logical. But have you ever wondered why so many of them end up divorced-- over and over again? Well, here’s my take on it: Physical beauty is about falling in lust; inner-beauty is about falling in love.
Physical beauty is all about the surface; about what the eyes can see, the hands can touch, the nose can smell and the lips can taste. Physical beauty is all about the color of the rose petals or the taste of the darkest chocolate, but for many of us there’s nothing underneath. There’s no spiritual presence, just momentary pleasure. And the same can be true of how we experience people.
Many “beautiful” people are simply eye-candy to the average person. They are pretty packages meant to be opened, fondled, tasted, consumed and then discarded like empty boxes. We fall in lust with one beautiful person until we are satiated with them physically and discover there is nothing underneath the physical beauty to keep our interest. So we discard them and move on. Surely there’s someone better, we think, and yet there never is as long as we are overlooking the spiritual element.
The spiritual element of a person is what we fall in love with. It’s what holds our interest and attention. It’s what makes one face different from all the others, and thus essential to our lives. And that spiritual element can be defined through heart wisdom in many ways. It can be the way a person looks right through us, into our very souls. It can be in the way they speak, both in words and mannerisms. It can be in their vision of life and mystery. It can be in the way they wear their sense of humor or hold their cup of coffee. And it can be in the way that their smile brings us a sense of comfort and well-being. Essentially, none of this has to do so much with physical beauty as it does with inner-beauty that can sometimes be expressed in physical ways.
Let’s face it. We can be in lust with multiple people everyday of the week, but we won’t find ourselves being in love with any of them. Love requires more than lust. Love requires taking time to really know someone, taking time to understand them and arriving at that spiritual place where God brings two souls together and unites them forever as soulmates. Soulmates love beyond the beauty that the eye can see. Soulmates love on a fully integrated physical and spiritual plain where they allow their souls to shine!
This is beautiful, nicely done. I do question the mannerisms though. Mannerisms convey attractiveness physically, which seems to defeat the purpose of your post. Mannerisms are also not the conveyance of values per se but the adoption of behaviors based on social comparison theory, or social recognition qua personality traits.
ReplyDeleteThanks. I always appreciate feedback. I hadn't re-read this one in a long time and am amazed because it almost doesn't sound like me. Gives credence to the idea that sometimes it's Spirit or Higher Power speaking through you.
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